Over the past eighteen months, I’ve lost 53 lbs. I’ve lost an entire Josie off my body, if you will. Yep, she’s five and weighs 53 lbs. Pretty astonishing to think of in those terms.
But I’ve gained so much more than the extra weight I’ve lost.
Last week, my little girl there said two things that showed me just what I’ve gained as I’ve lost:
1.She and I went out for lunch after her kindergarten meet & greet. At one point, she sat back in the booth, grinned broadly, and exclaimed, “I am just the right amount of full!” I still have trouble saying that, at times. May her tummy always be just the right amount of full, and may she always be so aware as to recognize it.
2. As we drove through the Target parking lot, I told my husband to just park in the back so we didn’t have to join the crazy towards the front of the lot. And from the backseat she piped up, “Yeah, park back here and let’s get some steps in!” Sponges. Our children are curious, intelligent, bright-eyed little sponges who will soak up whatever we are pouring out.
Whatever. we. pour. out.
I don’t always make the healthiest choice. I worry I’m scarring my kids when I yell. I am always late and don’t always remember to pack snacks.
Big picture: what am I pouring out consistently enough that they’re soaking up? What am I preaching that they’re also seeing me practice? The once-offs can hurt. But it’s the daily choices, the knee-jerk reactions, the reflections of who we really are, that stick.
Maybe it’s one thing, big or small, that you don’t even know you’re doing. (They know.) Maybe it’s one new habit you could add, or one that you could quit. My mind will be noticing more these days because I just didn’t even realize they were seeing the small changes I’ve made. (They saw.)
Here’s to the ones who notice us before we notice ourselves.
Here’s to pouring out good things.
Here’s to small changes, and the ways they can change not only our lives, but also those of other generations.